Satan’s Secret Trap
Satan has a secret weapon that he uses to defeat Christians. Through it, he steals joy and peace, stir up anger and strife, destroys friendships and marriages, as well as spoiling our witness. It’s a hidden trap.
It isn’t really a secret because God warns us against it. But because we aren’t alert to the danger, it sneaks up and drags us down without us even being aware that we are in bondage.
That secret weapon is judgment. We get caught in the trap because when something isn’t right we recognize it as wrong, unfair, dishonest, selfish, evil, or any other number of things. Consequently, we judge the person involved.
We’re often right in our judgment, but wrong in our judging—because it isn’t our place to judge another person. It’s God’s. When we judge, we get between the other person and God, making it harder for Him to get their attention and correct them.
(As a parent, how many times has one of your children made it difficult to effectively discipline another one, because the first one made such a ruckus about the offense that they got in the way? We do the same thing when we judge.)
Matthew records Jesus’ words, “Judge not, that you be not judged. For with what judgment you judge, you will be judged; and with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you” (Matt. 7:1-2).
Invading God’s space and acting as judge is bad enough, but a relationship becomes really tense when the person you are judging turns and judges you back. You feel the edge, react in judgment, and tension escalates.
The pressure and contention spiral upward while the friendship spirals downward and an evil-for-evil relationship unfolds. Before you realize what’s happening, you find yourself lacking joy and peace, especially when you think of that particular person.
Even more alarming, judging often spreads. Once it takes root, it invades another relationship and then another, until unpleasant undertones, if not conflicts, develop with several of your close friends or acquaintances.
If you’ve been wondering what happened to once healthy friendships, take note of the signs that judgment may have caught you in its trap.
Signs of judgment:
- You are easily irritated by a person, or quick to get angry.
- You have a negative, critical attitude when you think about them.
- You quickly see what they do wrong, and are slow to appreciate the good in them.
- There is tension in the relationship. You feel guarded around them, as if walking on pins and needles to not offend.
- It seems that nothing is good enough. You can’t seem to please them.
- Trust in the relationship has been broken and you no longer like the person.
- You have an evil-for-evil relationship, with quick negative reactions to small slights or misunderstandings.
Even if you have tried hard to act righteously and hide your negative thoughts and emotions, if you are experiencing several things in the list, you are likely guilty of judging another. If so, even your best efforts at responding correctly likely sound hollow and insincere.
If a friend tells you that have mumps, but they have little red spots a
ll over their body it doesn’t matter what they tell you, if you spend the day with them, you’ll get the measles, not the mumps. They may tell you a different story and try to hide the truth, but you can see through the words.
In like manner, the negative feelings that we try to hide by using gracious words are more visible to others than we realize. When we judge, it can be felt, and we will be judged in return.
Matthew goes on to say,
3 “And why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, `Let me remove the speck from your eye’; and look, a plank is in your own eye?
5 “Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye (Matt. 7:1-5).
The first step in overcoming judgment is to deal with your own heart. Ask God to search your heart and show you any unrighteousness that is lurking within.
Your joy and peace is not dependent on another person and cannot be destroyed by them. Clearing up your own heart and getting yourself right with God is necessary before joy and peace return, and certainly necessary before any effort with the other person will be fruitful.
Next week, I will give some steps toward forgiving the person and getting rid of the bitterness. In the meantime, don’t give the enemy permission to steal your joy and peace and ransack your relationships.
Jesus Christ has defeated Satan. Through Him we can reign in life, enjoying righteousness, peace, and joy, free from the destruction of bitterness.
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The story of my struggle with bitterness and how I overcame it is available through the free e-book, The Judgment Trap, available for download in the side bar at the top of the page.