How to Stay Hopeful When Things Seem Helpless

Do you know someone who is on the path to destruction? Someone making the wrong choices in life and unwilling to listen to counsel—or unable to overcome addiction so they can make reasoned choices.

It’s heartbreaking to watch them self-destruct. If you’re close to the situation, you feel helpless as you watch and can do nothing to halt their steady decline.

We celebrate the fact that God gives us free will . . . until we want to take control of someone we love in order to rescue them from self-destruction. All efforts are futile. There’s nothing you can do if that person doesn’t choose to listen.

Nothing but pray, seeking God’s mercy and intervention.

There are many situations where you are helpless to fix the problem, times of sickness, financial stress, relational problems, and more. Times when you’re easily overwhelmed by the circumstances and find it difficult to keep going.

If you aren’t careful, it can affect you too. As you grieve your loss—of hopes, dreams, relationship, productivity, even life–it robs you of peace and joy. If you let it, you’ll be pulled into the vortex of the difficulty.

If you remain focused on the problem, trying to figure out what you can do and how you can help, the darkness of helplessness and hopelessness will engulf you.

Jesus said, “if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If therefore the light that is in you is darkness, how great is that darkness!” (Matt. 6:23). That’s what the enemy wants, for us to lose sight of the Light and walk in darkness.

Don’t let the enemy pull you down. Several simple steps will help you live in victory, even in the midst of the trial.

Jesus is the Light of the World (John 8:12), and the source of our light (Eph 5:14). Furthermore, He called us out of darkness and into His light (1 Pet. 2:9), and told us to seek Him (Mt. 6:33).

As you seek God, your eyes will be toward the light, allowing your body to be filled with light—with hope, strength, faith, peace. When your soul is weighted down, turn your eyes on Jesus to let the light in and chase away the darkness.

You can’t ignore the problem. It’s too much in your face and/or too deep in your heart. When darkness begins to invade, bringing fear, confusion, helplessness, anger, hopelessness, guilt, or . . ., run to the Light. Gaze into Christ’s marvelous face.

If you want to walk in daily victory, gaze at the Lord and glance at the problem throughout the day. Don’t give the darkness a chance to creep in. Live with you gaze on Him.

God is bigger than any problem that we might face. Give Him all your worries and cares. He has won the victory.

Taking the problem to Jesus doesn’t guarantee it will work out the way you imagine, but He will not leave you (Mt. 28:20). He will not let the burden be greater than you can stand (1 Cor. 10:13), and He will strengthen you for the journey (Ps. 31:24).

Furthermore, you can be confident that when things don’t go your way, it’s because He has purposes that are beyond our understanding (Is:55:9, Rom 8:28). When things seem overwhelming to us, later we can often see how He worked good out of the devastating trial.

Second, remember that God is bigger than the problem. Think of times when He has been faithful in your life—times when He rescued you or when he worked good out of what seemed bad. Think on the times He was faithful in the lives of Bible heroes: David and Goliath, the miracles that freed Israel from Egypt, Daniel in the lion’s den, and so forth. God is sovereign. He has power over all, and He is faithful.

Third, ask the Lord for a rhema. Ask Him to speak to you and listen for His answer through His Word. Read the Bible seeking His Word for you for NOW, the verse or the phrase that jumps off the page and speaks to you, filling you with hope. Then hold onto that Word when your faith begins to falter.

Memorize it so it becomes part of you and will be quick to come to mind. It will be your salvation.

God said, “My son, give attention to my words; Incline your ear to my sayings. Do not let them depart from your eyes; keep them in the midst of your heart; for they are life to those who find them, and health to all their flesh” (Prov. 4:20-22).

In one particular relational struggle, God told me, “Don’t return evil for evil, but give a blessing instead, for you were called that you might inherit a blessing” (1Pet. 3:8).

Another time, He said, “Fear not!” (I was terrified of what I imagined for my loved one.), “Stand still and see the salvation of the Lord, . . . for I will fight for you, and you will hold your peace” (Ex. 14:13-14). (I was worried sick about how to “fix” the situation, but God told me to be still. When I began to fret, I held onto this verse and God did fight for me. He took care of it.)

Our hope is in the Lord. Not in ourselves. Not in other people. Not in the circumstances. If darkness of helplessness or hopelessness threatens to steal your joy and peace, run to Jesus. He is our hope and the author and finisher of our faith (Heb. 12:2).

“Isaiah says: ‘There shall be a root of Jesse; And He who shall rise to reign over the Gentiles, In Him [Jesus] the Gentiles shall hope.’ Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit” (Rom. 15:12-13).

How Can I Be Light in Darkness?

As Christians, we’re called to be light in the midst of darkness, to represent Christ to those who don’t know Him by letting His light shine through us.

I sometimes wonder how to do that. When I read FaceBook posts that spread lies about Christians, their beliefs, and their actions, I want to protest. I’m tempted to defend myself, my faith, and my Lord. But, it seems that will only stir up conflict. What does it mean to let your light shine in times of anger, manipulative lies, and name-calling?

So far, I’ve held my tongue, but the temptation to strike back reveals my heart. It’s clear that the old man is still kicking within.

Consequently, I sometimes wonder, “How should I respond to ‘them,’ to those with opposing views that are so vocal and in my face? What does a Christian act like in these times?”

Jeff Bramel shared from Romans 12 that gave clear guidelines on what the Christian life looks like. Furthermore, Paul lived in a time similar to ours, when immorality and corruption were rampant. He was speaking to believers who would have questions similar to ours.

I’m sure it isn’t even complete, but these verses are full of guidelines that are suitable for us today and are worthy of contemplation and prayer.

Paul told the Romans:

Abhor what is evil;
Cling to what is good (v. 9).
Be devoted to one another in brotherly love;
Give preference to one another in honor (v. 10);
Don’t lag behind in diligence,
Be fervent in spirit, serving the Lord (v.11);
Rejoicing in hope,
Persevere in tribulation,
Be devoted to prayer (v. 12),
Contribute to the needs of the saints,
Practicing hospitality (v. 13).
Bless those who persecute you; bless and curse not (v.14).
Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep (v.15).
Be of the same mind toward one another;
Do not be haughty in mind, but associate with the lowly.
Do not be wise in your own estimation (v. 16).
Never pay back evil for evil to anyone.
Respect what is right in the sight of all men (v. 17).
If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men (v. 18).
Never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,” says the Lord (v. 19).
“But if your enemy is hungry, feed him, and if he is thirsty, give him a drink; for in so doing you will heap burning coals upon his head” (v. 20).
Do not be overcome by evil (v. 21),
But overcome evil with good (Rom. 12:9-21 NAS).

This describes what it looks like to walk in right relationships with our fellow man. To consistently check off all the points is a challenge for most of us—especially if the actions come from the heart, rather than forcing an outward show.

And yet, if they are not from the heart, it is an impossible list.

In short, the answer to the question of how to let your light shine in the midst of the darkness, is deeper than I was asking. I wanted to know, “How do I respond? What do I do?”

But, I see by the things that Paul said that I cannot measure up.

Rather, I need to be transformed. I need to be surrendered so that the Lord will work through me and His light will shine through me. Then, He will bring it about, and only then will His purposes be realized through me.

Commit your way to the LORD, Trust also in Him, and He will do it.

⁶ And He will bring forth your righteousness as the light,

And your judgment as the noonday.

⁷ Rest in the LORD and wait patiently for Him;

Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way,

Because of the man who carries out wicked schemes.

⁸ Cease from anger, and forsake wrath;

Do not fret, it leads only to evildoing.

⁹ For evildoers will be cut off,

But those who wait for the LORD, they will inherit the land.

(Ps. 37:5-9 NAS)

God’s Spotlight

This past week three well-known, admired people made the news because secrets about them have been revealed. Things they have kept hidden are now in the spotlight for all the world to know. It’s impossible to hide a secret well enough that God’s spotlight can’t find it in the darkness.

Once hidden secrets are now the target of articles, blogs, and tweets as well as sidewalk chat as everyone makes comment on the latest revelations. But I’ll refrain from joining their ranks.

I’m reminded of the time that the Scribes and Pharisees brought a woman who was caught in adultery before Jesus to be stoned, “He straightened up [from writing in the sand], and said to them, “He who is without sin among you, let him be the first to throw a stone at her” (John 8:7).

The woman’s guilt was obvious. She was caught in the act, but Jesus, the Son of God, did not join in the chorus of condemnation. Instead, He turned the spotlight on the accusers.

He led them to search their own hearts.

In response to the latest revelations, I believe that we too need to search our own hearts.

We need to consider:

Jesus said, “There is nothing covered that will not be revealed, and hidden that will not be known” (Matt. 10:26). We’ve seen how quickly and unexpectedly hidden sin can be revealed. God knows all things anyway. It is so much better to humble ourselves and confess in the appropriate time and place (Jas. 5:16) rather than be found by a spotlight.
God disciplines those He loves (Rev. 3:19). Sin blocks our relationship with Him (Is. 59:2). When He shines His light in the dark corners of our lives, it is an expression of His love for us so sin can be removed and we can walk in freedom and victory with Jesus.
We are all tempted (1 Cor 10:13), and we have all fallen to temptation. Jesus said that when we look at a woman with lust, we have committed adultery already. We may not have lusted for a woman or a child, but how often has our heart yearned for things that were not of God? (Matt. 5:28). Can we justify pointing our fingers at another?
Jesus said, “Do not judge lest you be judged” (Matt. 7:1). God is judge. It is not our place to judge the guilty person as to motives or to condemn him/her by our gossip.
We need to pray for the person that has failed, their family and others involved. Pray for God’s kingdom to come and His will to be done in their lives (Matt. 6:10), or join Paul’s prayer for the Ephesians, “that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened, so that you may know what is the hope of His calling, what are the riches of the glory of His inheritance in the saints, and what is the surpassing greatness of His power toward us who believe” (Eph 1:18-19).
We need to pray for ourselves, that God would shine His light on any hidden sin and give us courage and humility to repent and confess. But for the grace of God, go I.
God will come to our aid to help us resist temptation (Heb. 2:18). Furthermore, He won’t allow us to be tempted beyond what we can resist if we call on Him (1 Cor. 10:13).

Instead of focusing on the sins of others, we need to ask God to shine His light on us. Like David, we can pray, “Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me and know my anxious thoughts; and see if there be any hurtful way in me, and lead me in the everlasting way” (Ps. 139:23-24).

“God is light, and in Him there is no darkness at all. If we say that we have fellowship with Him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth; but if we walk in the light as He Himself is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus His Son cleanses us from all sin” (1 John 1:5-7).

We don’t have to fear the spotlight revealing our secrets, we can run to the light and be cleansed of our sins.

Robert & Kay Camenisch encouraging and equipping relationships