Robert & Kay Camenisch encouraging and equipping relationships

A Model of a Godly Father

Have you ever wondered why the Bible doesn’t provide examples of godly fathers?

I think I figured out the answer last week. I don’t know why I haven’t seen it before.

I was thinking about fatherhood because our son told us about a sixteen-year-old friend—whom we’ll call Dustin—who ran away from home. He left a note that basically said, “Mom, thanks for all you’ve done for me. Dad, I hate to see you come home from work, because you’re always stressed and angry. It’s impossible to please you. Nothing I do is good enough, and I can’t take it anymore. Good bye.”

I was reminded of Ephesians 6:4, “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger; but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”

Dustin was provoked enough that he left home. He’s gone, along with his clothes. But, when Mom found the note, she didn’t call her husband, whom we’ll call Mike. Instead, she ran errands so she wouldn’t be there when he got home and read the note.

Dustin’s departure actually began four years ago when he began spending time with unsavory friends and was at home less. Three years ago he was caught doing drugs. Since then, he’s turned his back on God, saying he no longer believes. Dustin is now under a new roof—at a friend’s house—but he’s not OK. And he’s not safe.

My heart aches. This kind of family situation led me to search the Bible for answers and led to writing Uprooting Anger. I want to help bring this family back together.

But I know that before anybody can help, the father has to want it.

Men like Mike need biblical examples of godly fathers. But I can’t find one in the Bible.

Who is our model for fatherhood?

As I asked the question, I realized we have a perfect example of a godly father.

Could it be that the all-knowing God didn’t give us an earthly model because He wants us to keep our eyes on our heavenly example. The Lord is our model of a godly Father. He gave us a book so we can know what He’s like.

Old Testament history shows that our heavenly Father provided for all His children’s needs, protected them from harm, and caused them to prosper. He delighted in them and seemed to take great joy in making them successful.

Furthermore, He was exceedingly patient when His children were slow to learn. As long as they followed Him, He blessed them. He was slow to anger too—but He did get angry when they denied Him and turned away. However, He was quick to forgive when they returned to him after they disobeyed, failed to call on Him, or turned their backs on Him. He is the perfect Dad.

The contrast with a father whose anger is destroying the family is obvious. Mike went to church, but he doesn’t have many characteristics in common with the heavenly Father.

Mike does have one thing

He has a Father standing on the porch, watching for His son to come home. If Mike will acknowledge his sin and his need for help, he’ll be embraced—even celebrated—in spite of the destruction he’s caused with his anger.

Furthermore, the heavenly Father will heal the hurts from Mike’s past that led to destructive bitterness and anger. Nothing is too big for the Father to handle.

He is a redeeming God. In fact, If Mike will surrender to his Father, he will be given grace and strength for the journey of reconciliation with his son. Indeed, his Father will walk with Mike day by day.

Meanwhile, I pray. I’ve felt the peace and satisfaction that comes from being forgiven, seen transformation that only comes through the Father’s love, and had a stray child return home.

Consequently, I pray—and hope that Mike and Dustin will run to the perfect Father. He’s watching and waiting.

How have you seen the Lord move to restore relationships?

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