One Simple Solution for Anger
Trying to manage anger doesn’t work. You can hold a lid on it for a while, but it keeps boiling within. Then, without warning, it boils over.
I recently had a constant frustration that wouldn’t go away. I found myself on edge and easily angered for days–actually, weeks. After trying unsuccessfully to control my rising emotions, I bumped into a solution that got rid of the anger and surprised me in its simplicity.
My problem started when I got a new computer. Since I intuitively make the wrong choice on computers, I had more than my share of frustrations as I tried to adjust to a new computer and an updated version of Word. Emotions were heightened by time pressure from trying to finish a book and standardize its layout.
Repeatedly I had several challenges a day. I often spent half of my day trying to solve computer problems. As days of aggravation turned to weeks, I became more and more frustrated (translation: angry). One day, when I was ready to throw the thing out the window, a quiet inner voice said, “You’re not very grateful for your computer, are you?”
Inwardly, I said, “Of course I’m grateful. I work on the computer all the time. I sure don’t want to go back to a typewriter! Besides, my old computer was dying. I’m grateful I could get a new one.”
“Grateful?” echoed the little voice.
“Well, I’m grateful when it doesn’t act up. . . . At least, there are times I’m grateful. . . ..”
I finally came to the place of agreement. I wasn’t very grateful for my computer.
It didn’t take much thought to realize what a blessing a computer is to facilitate communication. The more I thought about it, the more grateful I was. With a grateful heart, the inner turmoil was replaced with a sweet calm.
A few days later, I was shopping and spotted a little smooth rock with “Gratefulness” engraved on it. I bought it, went home, and placed it so when I look above my computer screen, it’s directly in front of me. I bought a reminder to help me not
lose the peace I’d found.
It’s funny though, I haven’t needed the rock as much as I thought I would. My computer quit giving me so much trouble as soon as I got my heart straightened out. When I have a problem now, I’m more patient to work through it. And I find a solution more quickly because my brain isn’t short-circuited by anger.
Since my new insight, I firmly believe it’s hard (if not impossible) to be angry at something (or someone) while you’re grateful for it/them. Hmm, maybe that’s one reason God told us to give thanks for all things.
Being thankful is not the key every time. When I researched for Uprooting Anger, I discovered there are many other roots from which anger grows, but I sure am grateful to have discovered another one—ungratefulness.
Have you discovered any other simple solutions to conquer anger? I’d like to hear your story.
(kay@camenisch.net)
You can leave a comment by clicking here.