Robert & Kay Camenisch encouraging and equipping relationships

Is Anger Always Bad?

Many truths in Scripture are in tension. Truth is not always as simple as we want to make it. For example, my post “7 Answers to the Question, ‘Is Anger Good?’” tells only one side of the story.

I stand behind my statements that support the opinion that anger is not good in a relationship. I grant that there are times when I’ve gotten angry at my husband and the Lord fixed the mess I made and it turned out for good. I’m grateful for His mercy and redemption.

However, if I had acted righteously to begin with, I would have built the relationship up rather than tearing it down. God’s repair job wouldn’t have been necessary.

If the Bible is our authoritative source, we must conclude that anger is not always bad. Furthermore, we can learn to see it as a friend.

1. God gets angry. Roughly half of the references to anger in the Bible, including synonyms such as strife and wrath, refer to God’s anger. If God gets angry, we must assume that it is not always bad. He is good and holy and also the source of all good. When God gets angry, it is justified, and is good.

We are often told that God “burned with anger.” He killed His own people with plague, earthquakes, and the sword. However, He was—and is—“slow to anger and abounding in lovingkindness” (Ex. 34:6). His anger burned when His people rejected Him, refused to obey, and followed other Gods. He was just in His anger. When God gets angry, it may turn out badly for those who have denied Him, but it is good for the fulfillment of kingdom purposes.

2. We are made in the image of God. Therefore, we were created with the disposition to get angry. If it was good in God and we are the culmination of His miraculous creation and created in His image, we can assume that anger is also good in us.

Then, how can we claim that anger is bad?

We have one problem that God doesn’t. We are sinners. As descendants of Adam and Eve, we have sin in our DNA. We now deal with pride and self-centeredness that warps our responses to the world around us. Consequently, our anger is contaminated. We inherited a good thing, but in us it can never be pure. Our sin is expressed in our anger.

I believe we’re told to put all anger away because as we feel anger, we cannot effectively discern our own contamination (sin)—either where it is or how great it is. Consequently, unless the Holy Spirit convicts us, and we are sensitive to His promptings, we feel justified in releasing our feelings—even if we are in the wrong.

Therefore, in our place of self-justification, we could cause great harm to ourselves, someone else, and to relationships, and often never realize the damage done.

3. Our anger can be a gift to us. Even if our anger is contaminated, it can be a positive thing in our lives.

Anger has become a gift to me. It is a flag, a warning signal that I am likely harboring unrighteousness in my heart. When I become angered, I’m learning to ask the Lord to shine His light and to search me and show me any wickedness hiding in a corner of my heart.

The Lord is faithful—especially when I’m serious about dealing with sin. So far, every time I’ve been angry, and asked for His spotlight, it has revealed contamination.

He shows me things like: I have unrealistic expectations, am pushing my agenda, or I’m not loving (i.e. am easily provoked, am seeking my own, or have taken account of a wrong suffered).

I’m waiting for the day that it’s “all his fault.” However, every time I’ve sought to identify my own sin, I’ve been grateful for the opportunity to get right with God.

Anger is a gift when it’s used to locate the log in your own eye before dealing with the splinter in someone else’s.

It’s amazing, but once you get rid of the log, you hardly notice the splinter any more. That makes anger seem like a gift if you take care of it quickly, before it has a chance to do damage.

Have you found a way to use anger for gain in your life?

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