A Key to Raising Children Who Are Strong in the Lord
Reader’s Digest had an article in September about a trait that strong families share. In “The Stories That Bind Us,” Bruce Feiler, said “Strong families know—and teach the next generation—their histories.”
Marshall Duke, a psychologist at Emory University did a study in which he asked children to answer 20 questions about the histories of their families. They then did psychological tests on the same children. The results supported the theory that the more the children know about their family history, the better they measure in self-esteem and in the sense of being in control of their lives.
Those children felt that they were part of something bigger than themselves. Being connected to something bigger adds support and enhances identity. It makes sense that those who are aware of being part of something bigger are better adjusted and more resilient in life.
In conclusion, it seems it will help our children if we make an effort to introduce them to positive stories of our history so the children will feel a part of something bigger than themselves.
However, as I read the article, I kept thinking of the next step. How much better it will be to teach children about how God has worked in your family over the years. An awareness of God’s work in the family will introduce them to God, will strengthen a relationship with Him, and will teach of His love for them as an individual and as part of the bigger whole.
In Deuteronomy 6, God says, “Hear, O Israel! The Lord is our God, the Lord is one! And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all you might. And these words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart, and you shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up . . .” (vv.4-7, emphasis added).
The Word confirms the importance of teaching history to our children—but not just family history. These verses speak of teaching our children to love God. What better way to do it than to teach them family history that demonstrates God’s love for their family.
These words were spoken through Moses, while Israel was in the wilderness. God was instructing them so they would be a strong people whose hearts were turned to Him.
Joshua guided Israel into the Promised Land, led them as they conquered the enemy, and saw them settled in their new homes. Then he died and was buried.
“And all that generation also were gathered to their fathers; and there arose another generation after them who did not know the Lord, nor yet the work which He had done for Israel. Then the sons of Israel did evil in the sight of the Lord, and served the Baals” (Judges 2:10-11).
It is clear that the older generation did not obey God. They didn’t pass on the stories to their children of what God. The next generation didn’t love God or know what God had done in their midst. As a result, their sons turned their backs on God.
Family history is important, but it’s even more important for us to teach our children to know the Lord and what He has done for us—for our family, our church, our nation.
As parents and grandparents, aunts and uncles, we have an opportunity to impart life to our children simply by sharing our life with them. As we tell stories of our past and how God has cared for us and provided for us, even disciplined us, it will strengthen them.
Reading in the Old Testament about the history of Israel, it seems that it is not natural for us to tell our children the history of how God has worked in our lives. (Their revivals only lasted a couple of generations.) We need to be purposeful in and make specific plans for how to do that—especially in our mobile society where families get scattered and don’t interact daily with their extended family.
As we celebrate Thanksgiving, it’s a natural time to begin a tradition where we focus on sharing family history of times the Lord worked in our lives. Then maybe we could learn to “talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up” (Deut. 6:7).
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